Why breath is critical to wellness

So, I pray about everything that I can think of to heal myself and others. I talk to the Holy Spirit often and receive guidance. What I have a hard time doing is relaxing, meditating and sitting in silence. Most basic meditations suggest a simple technique involving following the breath. Keep your attention at the nostril, fill your tummy, count your breaths, etc. But my mind wanders so quickly, I just ask the Holy Spirit for more advice to listen to and go on my way.

But I think there is something to breathing that just hasn't clicked with me yet, until recently that is. I've noticed that breathing is expansive and pleasurable. There is a joy in breathing now for me like drinking is when I'm thirsty. I need conscious breathing like I need water! Yay! I think I will soon be able to meditate. But first... more processing...

I'm reminded to breath when I feel that familiar tightness that preludes my dark moods, putting space between my experience and my reaction. This air fills my lungs bringing oxygen and peace to my arms and belly and anywhere else I direct, really. This inturn begins physical prevention of the rise of the mood, relaxation. When I fill with air, the tightness, which is a response to the negative story I was using to explain the situation which was a trigger, it lightens. The tightness that would become some physical ailment if went unnoticed, fades. And I'm left with this space in time and physically, where I can choose another option, instead of the reflexive reaction I unconsciously agreed to.

From Abraham-Hicks I've learned that our thoughts become our reality. Our responses to our environment are mental habits that have built up over time. Some habits began in childhood where we were punished or rewarded to see a certain behavior one way or another. We must daydream optimism in order to create a more desirable reality. And we must make it a habit to do so. So in this space that I've created with my breath, I can invent a new story in response to my trigger. But I can't do that until I've completely haulted the mood's momentum. Which earlier tonight required 3 minutes of breathing.

Hay, was I meditating? I was focused on my breathing in order to avoid the rise of my anger. Of course I was meditating! That's why studies say that meditation helps in relaxation which helps in all realms of healing.

So now I need to figure out how to motivate myself to meditate and hold my attention on my breath for a reason other than that nagging anger on the horizon. Hmmm.

Perhaps with practice I will find more subtle pleasures in breath that I was previously unaware of because I judged meditation as work rather than for pleasure. So many stories to change, so little time. In the meantime, I can use my bad moods, negative thoughts, fears and worries to motivate me to breath and be still. To slow down and rethink what I believe. Instead of holding my breath at a frightening thought, I will exhale and take in more love-affirming oxygen to nourish my cells with.

Just sitting here in the time it took to type this, I caught myself holding my breath unconsciously in response to subtle fears and feelings of guilt. Like, oops! and I take a quick intake of air and hold it. All this talk of breath made me realize I was holding my breath. I followed the thoughts back to the sudden acute inhalation and then to the preceeding thought where the guilt/fear/worry originated. I noticed that memories from my day were making their way to my consciousness and my conditioned response caused acute apnea. Then I just took a long slow breath to loosen up and moved on with my thoughts.

I wonder why thoughts recur to us. I wonder if they come back to us so we can change our mind about them. Like, "remember me, you still feel shitty because you thought me up. Want to change your mind now?" Is that how the universe is showering us with blessings. All these thoughts are opportunities to heal?!? Sounds good to me!

God bless air, our thoughts and us all. May I remember to breath.